We've Forgotten How to Play
Reconnecting with childhood joys as an adult and how an Easter egg hunt reminded me that we're all still kids at heart
An Unexpected Spark of Joy
Over the bank holiday weekend, my husband and I set out to find some of the painted Easter eggs scattered around the city. We decided to focus our egg hunt efforts on Marylebone and the first one we spotted was in front of Daunt Books. It instantly sparked a childlike joy in us - both from seeing the egg itself, brightly and creatively painted as a colorful elephant, and from watching a family pose for photos with it.
My husband turned to me and stated that the kids looked like they were having the best day ever. To which I thought - aren’t we all out here, kids at heart, trying to have the best day ever?
As I reflected on that moment, it stirred a few things in me.
It reminded me of something my grandmother once said about aging. How one day you look in the mirror and wonder how you got there, because inside, you don’t feel any different. I’ve only had 34 years of experience getting older so far, but I already sense what she meant.
Secondly, it arose in me that, in many ways, we’re all still children. Learning, evolving, growing. This is the first time any of us are here, doing any of this. Compassion for ourselves and others goes a long way.
Thirdly, a friend of mine recently wrote about fun and playfulness, and it deeply resonated with me. This seems to be a prominent theme that myself and others close to me are navigating in life right now. Especially the idea of finding meaning beyond work and daily responsibilities. What are we making time for in our everyday lives that brings us joy?
What are the ideas that make our hearts skip a beat? The ones we suppress for fear of imperfect execution, failure, being seen trying, or being judged?
What if we could pursue those things with more joy? Trusting that joy itself might be the thing that gives them meaning?
What did you love doing as a child? Maybe Barbies or Legos don’t appeal to you anymore, but what were the qualities of the things you enjoyed? Was it storytelling, building something from nothing, being outside for hours, getting lost in your imagination?
What if our childhood passions still hold the keys to our authentic happiness? And what parts of that could you bring into your life today?
When I started my business, Maragold, it awakened something I hadn’t accessed in a long time - my creativity.
For years, I was caught in a loop of doing what I thought I should be doing, which eventually led to a pretty intense burnout in 2018. After leaving my job and giving myself space to figure out what was next, I began enrolling in creative workshops as a way to reconnect with my younger self and the things I loved before the weight of the “shoulds” took over.
Then last August, I started this Substack. I only began to take it seriously earlier this year when I had a moment of clarity and let go of my fear of judgment. I was the only one holding myself back. This little corner of the internet can exist simply because it brings me joy. It can exist because it lights up something in me that has always been there and that I’ve always wanted to explore.
These two experiences have me thinking often about our innate sense of wonder. How the things we loved as children, before we were toughened by life’s realities, are still woven into the fabric of who we are. This isn’t necessarily about work, though it can be. It’s about staying connected to what lights us up, in whatever form that takes.
Earlier this year, I asked friends and family to share a piece of life wisdom with me. Two responses stood out regarding this very topic, and have stayed with me ever since:
Pursuing your passions, whether inside or outside of work, creates the foundation for a meaningful, well-rounded life and helps you stay rooted in who you are.
A simple yet thought-provoking sentiment - If it’s not fun, what’s the point?
A Framework for Reconnecting
If you’re feeling disconnected, uninspired, or just craving a little more joy, you might try this too. I’ve put together a framework and some prompts to help you get started.
First, make a list of childhood joys.
Think back to what you loved doing as a kid. What made you feel free and totally in your element? What could you spend hours doing without realizing time passed?
Even if the actual activity doesn’t interest you now, the essence of it can likely be translated into your adult life.
Next, try to identify the core qualities or feelings from those things you loved doing as a kid.
Look for the why behind each one. What did each activity give you?
For example:
Arts & crafts = creativity, expression
Collecting things = appreciation, noticing
Dancing, singing, performing = embodiment, joy
Making mixtapes = storytelling, sharing emotion
Playing dress-up = self-expression
Playing outside = movement, adventure
Reading = imagination, wonder, escape
The characteristics you extracted from step 2 are clues as to what your inner child is craving now. Think about how you can tune into these qualities today.
This part might be tricky, but identifying what you're truly craving will help you recognize activities that evoke those same qualities. For this section, brainstorm small ways to invite those same feelings in.
Here are some examples:
Arts & crafts (creativity, expression)
Take a pottery class or jewelry-making workshop
Experiment with photography as creative expression
Collecting things (appreciation, noticing)
Create a digital photo collection of your favorite travels
Keep a gratitude journal
Dancing, singing, performing (embodiment, joy)
Take a dance class or get some friends together for a karaoke night
Try a movement meditation or embodiment practice
Making mixtapes (storytelling, sharing emotion)
Create themed playlists for friends or special occasions
Start a podcast or blog about something you're passionate about
Send voice messages instead of texts to loved ones
Playing dress-up (self-expression)
Experiment with personal style without worrying about trends
Play with makeup or accessories as creative expression
Playing outside (movement, adventure)
Go on a walk or hike, tune into nature
Join an adult recreational sports league
Reading (imagination, wonder, escape)
Join a book club
Create a cozy reading nook in your home
Set aside time for reading purely for pleasure, not information
I’d love to hear what you come up with, so please do share below!
When I break down these examples from my own life, I see how:
Playing with Barbies, paper dolls, Lego, Playmobil indicated a love of world-building, creativity and storytelling. As an adult, that love of imaginative play shows up in my passion for storytelling and creating meaningful experiences through writing, content creation, and design. I’m most energized when I get to dream up ideas and bring them to life with intention, beauty, and purpose.
Playing teacher demonstrated a natural inclination to guide, support, and share knowledge. Now, I feel lit up when I help others, share via my own experiences, and create content that informs and inspires. That desire to teach and uplift is still very present.
Painting, drawing, making jewelry, and going to art classes is perhaps the piece of my childhood that I feel most closely connected to. It highlighted a love of being creative, hands-on, and an appreciation for aesthetics. These first outlets for creativity turned into a lifelong love of creating things, whether that’s through making, writing, photography, or experiences.
Another prominent part of my childhood was time spent in Vermont in the summers. I loved it even though I didn’t identify as outdoorsy. This is, however, something I’ve been growing into and identifying with in recent years, especially living in a big city when I crave stillness, fresh air, and quieter moments. Walking, hiking, and tending to my window box at home I believe draw from the love of nature and natural beauty that Vermont gave me. Spending time in nature is a source of calm and clarity for me.
Watching HGTV, drawing floor plans, and constantly rearranging my bedroom reflected a fascination with environments, design, and transformation. I’ve always cared about how spaces and places feel. As an adult, this shows up not only in my love of design but also in my passion for travel, both discovering new places and returning to familiar ones that I feel a sense of connection to.
I enjoyed reading as a child, and still do! It’s important to me to carve out time for solitude and self-connection. Turning inward and being reflective while allowing my mind to transport to wherever the story takes me.
When I think about how these joys are present in my life now, it’s not about buying Playmobil sets (though I did pick up a Playmobil Vincent Van Gogh at the Van Gogh museum in Amsterdam…) or Barbies (and I did visit and LOVE the Barbie exhibition at the Design Museum last October), but rather in finding the grown-up versions of these joys.
Reclaiming Creative Joy Today
I can also still do things like make art, travel to Vermont or other places with similar environments, watch HGTV and dream about my future restoration project (I’m manifesting here…) and read!
And some other, more specific ways that I’m planning to explore this:
I’d like to play around with making some beaded jewelry. While spring cleaning last weekend, I uncovered beads that I’d purchased in South Africa as well as some that I unearthed from my childhood closet the last time I visited family. Finding them ignited something in me so I brought them back to London.
I’d also like to learn film photography. I’ve also always loved taking photos and recently took out the film cameras that I inherited from my grandfather, who passed away 2 years ago, and worked part of his adult life as a photographer. I always felt connected to him through our shared love of travel and as I’m heading to Japan later this year, one of his favorite places, I’d love to learn how to use the cameras before that trip to document my time there in a more intentional way. The film arrives tomorrow!
Recently, it’s come up in talking to multiple people - the commonality serving as a sign I can’t ignore - about the importance of doing things for fun… for you… outside of work. When work starts to feel like it is all consuming and lacking purpose, because let’s be real, we’ve all been there, what can you turn to in order to reclaim that sense of meaning and joy?
A closing thought and one that I’m still mulling over as I just left the yoga class in which it was shared:
Lost
by David Wagoner
Stand still. The trees ahead and bushes beside you
Are not lost. Wherever you are is called Here,
And you must treat it as a powerful stranger,
Must ask permission to know it and be known.
The forest breathes. Listen. It answers,
I have made this place around you.
If you leave it, you may come back again, saying Here.
No two trees are the same to Raven.
No two branches are the same to Wren.
If what a tree or a bush does is lost on you,
You are surely lost. Stand still. The forest knows
Where you are. You must let it find you.
When you’re feeling lost, all you must do is turn inward. You already have the answers. You know you best. How can you be more you with each passing day? In the act of doing that, everything else will fall into place. I’m going to try and take my own advice here, too.
For me, hiking and being near the sea are the best cure for the technological malaise of modern life. Need to do much more of that!